May 2008

I have no idea what that topic actually means. It sounded cool as it flowed from my brain, down my arms and out through my finger tips…..that description sounded even cooler, although sounds decidedly nerdy.

None of that has anything to do with wild swinging sex. Our second outing meeting a couple that we talked to online was very different than our first swinging experience. We chatted online with a couple who was a bit older than we are, but their pictures were very good and they looked much younger than their age. They also had been swinging for 10+ years so that was a big plus for us; we thought it would be great to meet a couple who weren’t new to this as there wouldn’t be any concern of any drama or crap coming up. At the very least we thought it would be awesome to talk to someone with a lot of experience who had made this kind of sexual activity a successful part of their relationship for a very long time. We didn’t waste a lot of time chatting with them online and we arranged to meet them downtown for some drinks and to see where things lead (no expectations). Incidentally, our best experiences have come after very short online conversations, prolonged online contact has either fizzled out or ended up in flat in-person meetings. Definitely now how we thought that would work out.

We showed up at the appointed hour and they had just walked in as well (second time thats happened! Us swingers are a prompt bunch). We found a nice booth and got comfortable with some drinks and a few snacks. Some very light social conversation and then the other couple lead the conversation straight to sex, swinging, how we got to where we are, what we’ve done, why we’ve done it, what we want to do… They wasted no time at all getting serious. It was cool though, they were very comfortable with the subject and that frame was contagious. We had a great open discussion about our experience, what we were interested in and then we started asking questions of them. They had all kinds of stories to tell of their experiences, how they have made this work for them, what they like. After a few hours though we started to get hints of them being very aggressive about this. We were out to have some drinks, get to know them and see what happened. They were out to quickly interview us, then fuck. As soon as we picked up on that we were immediately turned off. Katrina mentioned on the drive home that she felt like a notch on their bedpost, definitely not the situation that we were looking for.

So after a few drinks and lots of fun stories we got some advice from them on how they made this work in their relationship then quickly extracted ourselves and went back home. They were great people, very friendly and open, but they just weren’t right for us to get sexual with. We prefer a more intimate vibe and they were more about hit-it-and-quit-it.

A good learning experience for us. Good to meet a couple that we didn’t end up naked with shortly after; great to get some insight from a couple who had done this for over 10 years; great to hear some good and bad stories from their experiences and great to get home with a sexy Katrina for some time with just the two of us 😉

I guess the first swinging experience is probably the night that we first went to the swingers club, but since all we did was dance together and no one else was involved thats a far less interesting story. Although it was very interesting to be dancing and have women approach me confidently and completely unashamed of their sexuality. It caught me off guard at first, but it was (and continues to be) a very cool thing to see and be a part of. On subsequent visits to that swingers club I have noticed that not all women there have that kind of approach, but it was a cool introduction into this whole thing.

Thats a bit off topic though (I tend to do that, stream of consciousness writing!), so….on with the show!

In our first post I quickly got right to the point of describing how we got in touch with the first couple we were going to meet. Within less than a week from sending our first email to them we found ourselves at Saturday night with the phone number of another couple in our cellphone and plans to meet them for drinks, then head to the swinger club for some dancing and debauchery if we all got along well. Since it was “Miniskirt and heels” night at the swinger club I picked out the shortest possible skirt that I could (I bought Katrina one that looks more like a belt than a skirt….so hot) and she put on a long sweater dress on top of that to hide it since we were going to a normal bar first. Oddly enough we pulled into the parking lot at the bar exactly the same time as the other couple; just as Katrina and I were talking about whether we’d recognize them or not, we looked over and saw them walking towards us.

We all walked in to the bar together, grabbed a corner booth, ordered some drinks and started chatting. It was awkward at first; they had never done this before and we’d never even met anyone for drinks before, but after a drink we all relaxed a bit and did a bit of flirting, got to know each other a bit. We were all a bit hesitant to openly flirt with the others spouse right there in front of them and the two girls didn’t really have any idea of how to flirt with another girl so thinking back on it, the whole thing was pretty funny. Even now when we meet a couple we are still awkward and uncomfortable about the flirting thing at first, but we haven’t met many couples still so that will get easier I think. We quickly all realized we were totally attracted to each other (the girls found each other hot, I thought his wife was a knockout and he was blown away by my sexy Katrina…I assume she thought I was cute lol). So we had a quick conference with our respective spouses and decided to hit the swingers club.

At the swingers club there were a few shots done to loosen up and a lot of dancing. Still not too much flirting, but the girls danced a bit together and we all awkwardly went about dancing and having fun together until finally someone mercifully suggested we go upstairs to the on-premise part of the club to get naked 😉 We got upstairs, sat in some chairs and nervously chatted a bit more sexually before walking around together to find a good place we could all comfortably lay down. There was no romance or build up to this at all, just pure “we all want to do this, lets find somewhere to go”. All that awkwardness over the night that we’d spent together so far had built up a lot of sexual tension and it was about to be released. That anticipation, the thoughts of what I would think of seeing my gorgeous wife kiss, suck and grope another man; the thoughts of what my wife would think of seeing me kiss, lick, fondle and suck another woman. We all climbed into an area of the club that was a room with a giant mattress play area about the size of 10 beds put together (it is actually 10 beds put together lol) and I started fooling around with my wife, him with his wife. Suddenly the girls took over and the guys sat back to let them have their fun and I watched while they had sex with each other, the first time with another woman for both of them.

It was an exciting way to start our swinging experience and when he and I jumped back in I went to his wife and he to mine. It was very strange to look over and see him kissing my wife, going down on her and the look of pure pleasure on her face while he did it. I say strange because I felt a bit of jealousy, but I was also very calm and at ease with it. It seemed ok, seemed very hot, seemed almost normal. In talking about it afterwards on the drive home Katrina exclaimed that she was completely surprised at how comfortable she was with everything that happened; shocked at how easy going the vibe was and how normal it seemed to be doing it. Also surprised her a bit at how aroused she had gotten through the whole thing. We didn’t have full on sex with the other couple, we stopped short of doing that although we blew the few rules out of the water that we’d set out for ourselves. Our plan was to only have the girls play with each other and the guys would play with their own wife, but we ended up doing everything but have sex with the others wife. No one pushed us to go that far, we just went with the flow of what we were comfortable with in the moment and let go of our rules.

Before the night started I was unsure of whether Katrina would want to do this again, but on the drive home after we chatted about our experience for a bit there was a little silence while we both processed the events of the night. She broke the silence with “So….do you think they are busy next weekend?”

We’ve been reading a lot of blogs on sex, swinging, polyamory and other related subjects (with some naked pictures and porn mixed in) for a fair while now and I finally decided that I wanted to blog a bit about our experiences exploring this side of our relationship.
So to introduce ourselves, we are Slevin and Katrina (no, not really…but those are some cool damn names); we are that nauseating couple who were highschool sweethearts that lasted through the years and finally ended up getting married. We’re in our early 30’s, been married for about 7 years and only this year did we finally decide that we would start bringing other people into our sex life. It is something that we talked about off and on for quite a while, I brought up the idea of a threesome to a very chilly reception by Katrina. I was a bit of an idiot about it, brought it up in a very idiotic way and rather than being smart about talking about it what I did is better described as ‘pestering’. Thankfully I let that die for a while and found a much smarter way to approach it and in that time Katrina also started fantasizing about it more.

Finally this year after a lot of fantasizing and talking about it during sex I told Katrina that we were going to go to a swingers club. We went a few times to a great swinger club in town and just kept to ourselves and had fun. Once we were both comfortable with that I suggested we look online to see if there were other couples that we were both attracted to that we might like to meet. We signed up on a couple of sites and sifted through a lot of ads, talked about what we were comfortable with, the kind of people we wanted to meet and all kinds of stuff. It seemed like we’d just keep talking about it on and on forever, but then in October we sent a message to a very hot looking couple and immediately struck up a great flirtatious rapport with them. After a couple of emails we decided not to waste anytime and arranged to meet for a drink that weekend. We picked a time and place, exchange phone numbers and it was all planned….

We were about to meet our first couple on our way to some awesome sexual adventures.